Sixty-Eight Fun Things to do in Walmart
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3.Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing Football; see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Run up to an employee (preferrebly a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him " I need some tampons!!"
6. Try on bras in the sewing/fabric department.
7. Try on bras over top of your clothes.
8. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms
9. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "sex and candy"
10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.
11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".
12. Play with the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this ****, anyway?"
15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.
16. Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually.
17. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins. 18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"
20. Put M%26amp;M's on layaway.
21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
23. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
24. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"
26. TP as much of the store as possible.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.
29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"
31. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
33. Take bets on the battle described above.
34. Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. G.I. Janes. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect!!!)
35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
36. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room.
37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission:Impossible."
38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
40. Fill your cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone's jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.
41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
42. Two words: "Marco Polo."
43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle,etc.
44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.
45. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.
46. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "the fat man walks alone," and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them
47. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying "How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed ME darling." Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.
48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"
49. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
51. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good bessie."
52. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putiing one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.
53. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something,quickly make off with it without saying a word.
54. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
55. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
56. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.
57. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)." When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. "hi!!!! (giggle) What's your sign?(giggle)."
58. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
59. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
60.When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.
61.Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
62.Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
63.Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
64. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"
65. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
66. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."
67. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
68. Get boxes of Condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they don't realize it!
Do you think these are funny?
Very good! I have it in for Wal Mart anyway. This should make my next visit much more interesting. Thanks!
Reply:A lot of time on ones hands? You should suggest those to girls behaving badly, because I have a very strong feeling they would actually do that stuff. Report It
Reply:Yea i think this is pretty funny Report It
Reply:oh my gosh that is hilarious Report It
Reply:I've seen that before...I've tried doing them, but some employees caught me.
Reply:You completely cracked me up!!! Haven't laughed like that in ages - I have tears in my eyes!!! I can just imagine someone doing those things - I'm still laughing as I type this! But............ remind me NEVER to go shopping with you!!
Reply:no
Reply:those are funny like high prices are hilarious
Reply:I loved these. I have actually done many of them, or a variation of them. I loved the on about sacrifices.
Concerning the condom one....that works best with an old woman-putting three or four boxes in her cart.
Reply:Oh my gosh! I love it! I totally cracked up over all the stuff you put up. I probably look like a nut laughing hysterically all by myslef in the house. LMFAO but who cares?! Good job if you made all these things up by yourself...it would be fun to go shopping with you...although i would hide and watch from a distance. LOL.
Reply:I like no.31.. lol
Reply:Hahaha, they're really good! I don't have a Wal Mart, but I have an Asda! *Sly look*...
Reply:I must commend you for writing down 68 things to do.
Reply:these are HILARIOUS!!! i have to do some of them!
Reply:my family's looking at me like im crazy because i was laughing so hard^_^
Reply:That is very halarious!!! lol, lmao, rogl, roglmao!!! im gunna try a few of these!!!
Reply:My friends did all of this at one store because they thought it would be funny. And they got banned from Target, Cosco, Walmart, and most of the malls in southern california.
Reply:yeah, these are pretty funny. it would be awesome to see someone do this.
Reply:some of them were more funny then others,
but there was a problems with 67, i haven't seen a typewriter in a long time, maybe you should put the "/ computers" after the word typewriter.
maybe you add
go to the camera department with a friend and look at the cameras which are connected with the security cord and have your friend act like they are a model and you practice taking pictures.
go to the hardware department and get a step ladder and start walking through the store and see if anyone asks why you have the step ladder...... i need to reach something from the top shelf.
if you speak more than two language, talk to the employee with a foreign language, when they got some one who speaks that language, talk in a different language.
Reply:I think I've shopped behind you before.
Reply:yo jokes are kinda funni
lol
hair accessories
Friday, July 31, 2009
Shin splints?
What are shin splints exactly and how do you get rid off them. I think i have them. I have the right shoes (asic sneakers new) And the insides of my legs hurt. I have a race tomorow.
Shin splints?
I used to run a little just for exercise back when I was in college, and I got them once. It's a very very sharp pain in your shins along with stiffening of the muscles in the shins caused by over-exertion. What caused mine was the fact that I wasn't wearing the right shoes for running and that I was running on concrete. There is no quick way to get rid of it as far as I know. Mine were so bad I could barely walk and it took me 2 weeks to completely heal. All I can say is stay off of your feet as much as possible, get massages and apply cold for the pain and then apply heat to loosen the muscles.
I also found some info that might help: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shin_splint...
dancing quotes
Shin splints?
I used to run a little just for exercise back when I was in college, and I got them once. It's a very very sharp pain in your shins along with stiffening of the muscles in the shins caused by over-exertion. What caused mine was the fact that I wasn't wearing the right shoes for running and that I was running on concrete. There is no quick way to get rid of it as far as I know. Mine were so bad I could barely walk and it took me 2 weeks to completely heal. All I can say is stay off of your feet as much as possible, get massages and apply cold for the pain and then apply heat to loosen the muscles.
I also found some info that might help: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shin_splint...
dancing quotes
Does poetry really have to rhyme?
I think that the most difficult part of writing poetring is rhyming, however a common statement is that poety always has to have some sort of rhyming pattern in it. I disagree. I see a lot of poetry that doesnt rhyme at all so i experimented a little. Here is a non-rhyming poem that i wrote about long- distance relationships:
Sitting at my desk, constantly staring
at the clock, waiting like i do day in and day out
my heart races in anxiety
as i count down the seconds
The bell sounds and I race out the door
not caring for the three people
that i almost collide with in my haste
Kick my shoes off, and my jacket next
I toss it into the floor, neatness is overrated
at the present moment. i waste no time signing in
"No, i dont want a free iPod", i think, killing
the barrage of popups that has become routine.
I didnt care about Tom's latest update either
all i wanted was to talk to my angel
I think it sounds a bit wierd without the rhymes, but what do you think?
Does poetry really have to rhyme?
Yes, rhyming is difficult, which is why you see so many people on here who don't do it, but half of a poem is the sound of the words (the other half being the meaning). Not paying attention to the sound of the words is like writing a song without caring what the notes are. If you're going to play out of tune, you better have a really good reason.
Reply:it doesnt hav to rhyme it can be a free verse which is a poem that doesnt rhyme n i actually liked it its pretty good yea
Reply:Poetry, unlike most writing, are all the best words in all the right order.
I've written many poems w/o rhyming. Poetry is not just about simple word play. It's about visualizing and feeling the writer's words. But no two readers will see or feel the poem in the same way.
I personally prefer poetry without rhyming. Rhyming automatically limits a writer to what they can do with piece. A,B, A, B: or A, A, B, B: or A, B, B, A those are rhyme schemes. (too predictable for me)
There is also enjammed rhyming which is when the words rhyme in the middle of the lines as opposed to at the end. There are partial rhymes where the words almost rhyme.
Practice w/o rhyming, soon you might be a fan of non-rhyming poetry.
I think your poem needs a little work, but over all I like it w/o the rhyming.
=0)
Reply:...And this is just being honest, its as painful as reading Chaucer's Canterburry Tales.
Reply:Absolutely not. You can write anything you want! A poem is about self-expression or communicating something you're passionate about. If it doesn't rhyme it's called blank verse and many many great poets used this. (John Milton's epic titled Paradise Lost for instance) It helps to make it an iambic pentameter though, it flows much better - if you don't know what that is it simply means that there is a pattern to your stressed and unstressed syllables and that you have a certain number per line. Just express yourself anyway you know how and that is poetry.
Reply:it is not nesessary, but it will sound kinda wierd :D
Reply:No it doesn't have to rhyme... like the hycoo... it's a poem with 3 lines that are 5 syllables 7 syllables 5 syllables and it doesn't rhyme...
Reply:yes, rhyme is the reason for poetry
Reply:When it does not rhyme, it's often called "prose" but yeah, you can call it poetry...and I think yours sounds just fine. Good work!
The Old Mick likes!
Reply:It doesn't have to rhyme. Ancient Greek and Roman poetry didn't rhyme. Rhythm and meter were the important aspects.
Reply:Ogden Nash, X. J. Kennedy and Dr. Seuss use rhyme to great comic effect, but if you are writing a poem about the difficulty of dealing with a long-distance relationship, do you really want it to be sing-songy, or catchy? It seems like it would detract from the piece. I don't know of ONE published contemporary poet who writes in rhyme successfully (unless it is for humor).
If you are writing a sonnet, limerick or nursery rhyme, then sure! rhyme your little heart out. If you are a songwriter, rhyme in time. If you are a poet, let images and sound (NOT rhyme) be the star of your poem.
Try internal rhyme if you feel the need to for the echo effect...
Good poem, btw-- Keep up the great work.
Reply:it's simple. if you are a poet, it's easy for you to rhyme. if not, - write prose.
I don't understand "poets" who declare that rhymes are not obvious.
it goes out of the definition "poem".
and when I read rhymeless poems I just feel that I waste my time. :(
Reply:I read poems like that all the time, ones that tell stories but don't rhyme. I love them, I think your's is awesome. Good work!
Reply:It definitely doesn't have to rhyme. Didn't you ever do a haiku in elementary school? There are many types of poetry, some rhyming, some just have a pattern of syllables (such as the haiku), etc. I like yours. :-)
Reply:No, poetry does not have to rhyme. I liked your poem. Poetry is just your thoughts spilled out on paper. You don't think in rhyme form, so your poems don't need to rhyme. It's just to add flair. Like it's neat when people find creative ways to rhyme and make sense. Like a intellectual rapper . i.e. Common, Mos Def, Talib Kwali. Keep doing your poetry the way you like! It's about you and your perspective on life.
Reply:Ryan,
Let me tell you in poetry
that poems dont necessarily have to rhyme
most of mine in here don't
but some of mine still do otherwise
I guess its a habit.
One poem that does rhyme
September Poem ( I can hardly wait )
On Saturday is the month of September
there are some things to remember
At least here there are many activities
like a few anniversaries
There is more to say
including people with birthdays
one in particular is mine
which can be a good sign
I could be celebrating twice
and this would be nice
celebrating these events is necessary
well to me
One occasion would be Labor Day
This is all I have to say.
Bye.
Reply:We R accustom to the rhymes, but it does not have to.
Just make sense to you the writer, and if others get it, then it is great.
Likes this.
Reply:Poetry doesnt have to rhyme. There are all different typed of poetry..i think youre poem is very nice..even comical at the end. Nice touch!
Reply:I like your poem - and it doesn't have to rhyme: Once you've experimented with non-rhyming poetry, it will begin to feel right. Most modern poetry doesn't rhyme. However your poems can still have a rhythm.
Ancient hebrew poetry never rhymed: Instead they made a statement and then directly underneath they said the same statement in a different way. In this way they kept pairing off sentences or statements.
Poetry is fun - keep experimenting!
Reply:it doesnt have to ryhme..just have meaning..even if it only has a meaning to you...your readers just have to find out the meaning even if it doesnt have a meaning.
Reply:Nah I don't think it always has to. Alot of the time it rhymes because it's their general style and feelings. Even in songs though, they don't rhyme all the time so don't worry about it :D
Reply:I LIKE IT!!
and POETRY DOES NOT HAVE TO RHYME!!!
infact some of the best poems don't rymee
as long as it has some sort of beat to it or rythem
and if its really deep
Reply:it is not necessary for poetry to rhyme,
but a rhymed poetry is music to ears,
your poem is interesting....even without rhyming...
just because you wrote it good....
Reply:I'm a free lance writer. I took classes in the writing of all kinds. As to poetry must rhyme or have a pattern isn't true at all! Unless u want it to. It is up to u. Here's one I wrote about 2 years ago. Every one like it. A ROOM WITH NOTHING AT ALL. A STAR THAT DOESN'T SHINE AT ALL. A BLACK HOLE THAT GIVES OFF LIGHT. I'M SITTING ON A FEILD OF NOTHING BUT WHITE LIKE A PAPER WITH NO WRITING UPON IT. Have fun in what u like to do. I hope I answer what u seek. All I can say: do what u like to do, for fun of it, or for pay for it. I like what u wrote just keep at it. This type of poetry is call silly poetry what I wrote in BIG LETTERS. ENJOY IT KID!!!!
Reply:Howdy,
To rhyme or not to rhyme, that is the question. And the answer -- no, poetry need not rhyme. There are many different kinds of poems, many of which have nothing to do with rhyming. However, all poems should have rhythm and flow.
Still, there is something about a rhyming poem that makes it pleasing to read. The first link below is a rhyming dictionary from poetry.com. If you're looking for a word that rhymes with anything but "orange," it may help you out.
Mike
Reply:Poetry doesn't have to rhyme, but to me, poetry is about telling a story using very few words, and so you need literary devices to help people understand what you mean. Like metaphors and similes. You have one device -- personification -- heart racing, but you could use a LOT more. You are telling me a story, instead poetry is supposed to show it to me.
fashion accessories
Sitting at my desk, constantly staring
at the clock, waiting like i do day in and day out
my heart races in anxiety
as i count down the seconds
The bell sounds and I race out the door
not caring for the three people
that i almost collide with in my haste
Kick my shoes off, and my jacket next
I toss it into the floor, neatness is overrated
at the present moment. i waste no time signing in
"No, i dont want a free iPod", i think, killing
the barrage of popups that has become routine.
I didnt care about Tom's latest update either
all i wanted was to talk to my angel
I think it sounds a bit wierd without the rhymes, but what do you think?
Does poetry really have to rhyme?
Yes, rhyming is difficult, which is why you see so many people on here who don't do it, but half of a poem is the sound of the words (the other half being the meaning). Not paying attention to the sound of the words is like writing a song without caring what the notes are. If you're going to play out of tune, you better have a really good reason.
Reply:it doesnt hav to rhyme it can be a free verse which is a poem that doesnt rhyme n i actually liked it its pretty good yea
Reply:Poetry, unlike most writing, are all the best words in all the right order.
I've written many poems w/o rhyming. Poetry is not just about simple word play. It's about visualizing and feeling the writer's words. But no two readers will see or feel the poem in the same way.
I personally prefer poetry without rhyming. Rhyming automatically limits a writer to what they can do with piece. A,B, A, B: or A, A, B, B: or A, B, B, A those are rhyme schemes. (too predictable for me)
There is also enjammed rhyming which is when the words rhyme in the middle of the lines as opposed to at the end. There are partial rhymes where the words almost rhyme.
Practice w/o rhyming, soon you might be a fan of non-rhyming poetry.
I think your poem needs a little work, but over all I like it w/o the rhyming.
=0)
Reply:...And this is just being honest, its as painful as reading Chaucer's Canterburry Tales.
Reply:Absolutely not. You can write anything you want! A poem is about self-expression or communicating something you're passionate about. If it doesn't rhyme it's called blank verse and many many great poets used this. (John Milton's epic titled Paradise Lost for instance) It helps to make it an iambic pentameter though, it flows much better - if you don't know what that is it simply means that there is a pattern to your stressed and unstressed syllables and that you have a certain number per line. Just express yourself anyway you know how and that is poetry.
Reply:it is not nesessary, but it will sound kinda wierd :D
Reply:No it doesn't have to rhyme... like the hycoo... it's a poem with 3 lines that are 5 syllables 7 syllables 5 syllables and it doesn't rhyme...
Reply:yes, rhyme is the reason for poetry
Reply:When it does not rhyme, it's often called "prose" but yeah, you can call it poetry...and I think yours sounds just fine. Good work!
The Old Mick likes!
Reply:It doesn't have to rhyme. Ancient Greek and Roman poetry didn't rhyme. Rhythm and meter were the important aspects.
Reply:Ogden Nash, X. J. Kennedy and Dr. Seuss use rhyme to great comic effect, but if you are writing a poem about the difficulty of dealing with a long-distance relationship, do you really want it to be sing-songy, or catchy? It seems like it would detract from the piece. I don't know of ONE published contemporary poet who writes in rhyme successfully (unless it is for humor).
If you are writing a sonnet, limerick or nursery rhyme, then sure! rhyme your little heart out. If you are a songwriter, rhyme in time. If you are a poet, let images and sound (NOT rhyme) be the star of your poem.
Try internal rhyme if you feel the need to for the echo effect...
Good poem, btw-- Keep up the great work.
Reply:it's simple. if you are a poet, it's easy for you to rhyme. if not, - write prose.
I don't understand "poets" who declare that rhymes are not obvious.
it goes out of the definition "poem".
and when I read rhymeless poems I just feel that I waste my time. :(
Reply:I read poems like that all the time, ones that tell stories but don't rhyme. I love them, I think your's is awesome. Good work!
Reply:It definitely doesn't have to rhyme. Didn't you ever do a haiku in elementary school? There are many types of poetry, some rhyming, some just have a pattern of syllables (such as the haiku), etc. I like yours. :-)
Reply:No, poetry does not have to rhyme. I liked your poem. Poetry is just your thoughts spilled out on paper. You don't think in rhyme form, so your poems don't need to rhyme. It's just to add flair. Like it's neat when people find creative ways to rhyme and make sense. Like a intellectual rapper . i.e. Common, Mos Def, Talib Kwali. Keep doing your poetry the way you like! It's about you and your perspective on life.
Reply:Ryan,
Let me tell you in poetry
that poems dont necessarily have to rhyme
most of mine in here don't
but some of mine still do otherwise
I guess its a habit.
One poem that does rhyme
September Poem ( I can hardly wait )
On Saturday is the month of September
there are some things to remember
At least here there are many activities
like a few anniversaries
There is more to say
including people with birthdays
one in particular is mine
which can be a good sign
I could be celebrating twice
and this would be nice
celebrating these events is necessary
well to me
One occasion would be Labor Day
This is all I have to say.
Bye.
Reply:We R accustom to the rhymes, but it does not have to.
Just make sense to you the writer, and if others get it, then it is great.
Likes this.
Reply:Poetry doesnt have to rhyme. There are all different typed of poetry..i think youre poem is very nice..even comical at the end. Nice touch!
Reply:I like your poem - and it doesn't have to rhyme: Once you've experimented with non-rhyming poetry, it will begin to feel right. Most modern poetry doesn't rhyme. However your poems can still have a rhythm.
Ancient hebrew poetry never rhymed: Instead they made a statement and then directly underneath they said the same statement in a different way. In this way they kept pairing off sentences or statements.
Poetry is fun - keep experimenting!
Reply:it doesnt have to ryhme..just have meaning..even if it only has a meaning to you...your readers just have to find out the meaning even if it doesnt have a meaning.
Reply:Nah I don't think it always has to. Alot of the time it rhymes because it's their general style and feelings. Even in songs though, they don't rhyme all the time so don't worry about it :D
Reply:I LIKE IT!!
and POETRY DOES NOT HAVE TO RHYME!!!
infact some of the best poems don't rymee
as long as it has some sort of beat to it or rythem
and if its really deep
Reply:it is not necessary for poetry to rhyme,
but a rhymed poetry is music to ears,
your poem is interesting....even without rhyming...
just because you wrote it good....
Reply:I'm a free lance writer. I took classes in the writing of all kinds. As to poetry must rhyme or have a pattern isn't true at all! Unless u want it to. It is up to u. Here's one I wrote about 2 years ago. Every one like it. A ROOM WITH NOTHING AT ALL. A STAR THAT DOESN'T SHINE AT ALL. A BLACK HOLE THAT GIVES OFF LIGHT. I'M SITTING ON A FEILD OF NOTHING BUT WHITE LIKE A PAPER WITH NO WRITING UPON IT. Have fun in what u like to do. I hope I answer what u seek. All I can say: do what u like to do, for fun of it, or for pay for it. I like what u wrote just keep at it. This type of poetry is call silly poetry what I wrote in BIG LETTERS. ENJOY IT KID!!!!
Reply:Howdy,
To rhyme or not to rhyme, that is the question. And the answer -- no, poetry need not rhyme. There are many different kinds of poems, many of which have nothing to do with rhyming. However, all poems should have rhythm and flow.
Still, there is something about a rhyming poem that makes it pleasing to read. The first link below is a rhyming dictionary from poetry.com. If you're looking for a word that rhymes with anything but "orange," it may help you out.
Mike
Reply:Poetry doesn't have to rhyme, but to me, poetry is about telling a story using very few words, and so you need literary devices to help people understand what you mean. Like metaphors and similes. You have one device -- personification -- heart racing, but you could use a LOT more. You are telling me a story, instead poetry is supposed to show it to me.
fashion accessories
How is it?
m only 13 yrs old and this is the first chapter of my book.
It’s a beautiful morning. The sun was peeking from the horizon. The spring air was fresh, and the grass was damp from the morning dew. The earth slowly awakened from the peaceful night before. Jake Clemons was always up in time to watch the sunrise. He’s up before the rooster crows.
He got dressed quickly to watch the sunrise. He had to be quiet as he put on his red shirt ad blue jeans. He tiptoed down the hallway, and he passed Jamie’s room. Jamie was his 7 year old sister.
After he passed everyone’s rooms, he hurried down the stairs and out the door. He jogged towards the big red barn. He felt the dampness of the grass seep into his shoes. He then ran through the dry hay and to the silver ladder leading up to the loft. Jake climbed up the ladder and then he crawled towards the loft window and opened it. He sprawled out on the hay and gazed at the sunrise.
Watching the sunrise was a good time for Jake to think, and get his thoughts together. It was his only moment of peace during the day. He couldn’t possibly think in the day with all the commotion from his little sister, and all the work that had to be done, there was just no time.
“****-o-doodle-doo!” the rooster cried. It was time to get back to the house and cook breakfast. Jake usually made breakfast because everyone was just waking up at the sound of the rooster.
This morning he cooked scrambled eggs, toast, and he heated up some leftover sausage from the morning before. Everyone got seated at the table. It was delightful meal and got the day started off.
His parents usually watched the news right after breakfast, and then they get ready for work. Apparently they left it on, because Jaime was watching it when they got done watching it. He flipped the switch to turn the TV off.
“Hey!” Jaime whined.
“Jaime, you shouldn’t be watchin’ this stuff. It gives you nightmares.” Jake had already gone through experience. A few weeks ago they were watching the news and it was talking about some guy who escaped from the county jail near Chester. Jaime couldn’t go to sleep that night because she thought he would come and get her while she was sleeping.
“Fine,” she scoffed.
As soon as she left the room, he turned it back on.
“There is currently a prison escapee on the loose. He stole the security guard’s keys and escaped. He goes by the name of Greg Richards.”
It showed a picture of the escapee. He had a brown buzz cut, a goatee, and his ear pierced. He had a tan, and he looked to be in about his late 20’s. The news anchor continued with the story, “He was last seen driving a black Dodge Ram. If you have any information about this man, please call the police.”
“Jake, turn that off. You’ll probably have nightmares just like Jaime.” His mother was always comparing him to Jaime like that.
“Yes ma’am.” Jake turned off the TV.
His parents left for work about eight and they usually got home about 5:00. His mom worked at the grocery store as the manager and his dad worked at the local bank.
There was nothing to do at the house, so Jaime asked Jake if he could play a game with her. He didn’t mind, but she wanted to play some of the stupidest games.
“Okay Jaime, what do ya wanna play?” Jake asked reluctantly.
“Let’s play hide and go seek!” Jaime shouted. Jake never argued against having to play hide and go seek. It was one of his favorite games. He usually let Jaime hide otherwise she would whine and cry.
They ended up playing hide and seek for hours. His parents finally arrived home, so now he could go do something instead of playing with Jaime all day.
Jake figured he’d ride is bike. It was in terrible condition with worn out tires, red and rusted paint job, and the seat torn up. But he didn’t care. It was his only option to get away from the world. It made him feel free. He rode it everywhere around town. Of course the town was small enough to see everything in less than an hour on a bicycle.
The town was called Chester. It’s a population of about 1200 people. Chester has a bunch of old buildings from a long time ago. But most of those are abandoned. People just had a hard time keeping business in Chester. A whole bunch of people moved, which caused a lot of businesses to move, also.
His brown hair was waving in the wind. As he was riding his bike, he heard some bells from a distance. Not like the bells you hear at Christmas time, but big bells. They made such a noise that the whole town could hear them. Maybe even the whole county.
He decided to check and see where the bells were coming from. He followed the sound of the bells. It took about 2 minutes to get to where they were. They were coming from some large brick building with a white steeple. At the top of the steeple, there was a small cross. What kind of building has bells, and a steeple with a cross? He wondered. He decided to take a look inside.
He walked down the aisle of red carpet. There were people sitting in long stretched pews. Everyone was dressed nice and elegant. He felt like an outcast with the raggedy clothes he had on.
“Excuse me, young man. Why are you wearing such clothes?” an older woman asked him. He tried to speak but words wouldn’t budge. He was embarrassed.
“Young man?” she said.
He ran to the back of room. As he tried to get out the door, a man spoke. Jake turned around and saw a man in the front of the room. The man was tall, and he looked to be in his 30’s. He was wearing a white robe with a green stripe down the middle.
“Thank you everyone for being here tonight,” he said speaking through a microphone.
“I am the new preacher. My name is Dan Miller. I have recently moved here from Alabama, with my daughter, Carley, and my wife, Joyce,” he stated gesturing to his family in the front row.
Carley had shoulder length brown hair. She had the most amazing blue eyes Jake had ever seen.She looked nothing like her mom, Joyce.
Jake figured he would stay and listen what Dan had to say. He didn’t have to be home until 8 and it was only 6:45. He went and got seated in the last pew. He paid attention to this preacher as he spoke.
“God has a great amount of power. He is so big. He can do anything!” Dan exclaimed raising his hands in the air.
“Anything?” Jake whispered to himself.
Dan preached for the next hour about this God person. He said God was the man who created this very earth, and created us to live in it. Jake couldn’t wait to tell his parents about God.
Jake glanced at his watch. It read at exactly 7:56. Jake was supposed to be home at 8:00 sharp. He jumped on his bike and sped away. His house was about 1 mile out of Chester, so it took him about 10 minutes to get home, but at the speed he was going, Jake could’ve swore he got there in less than 5 minutes. He jumped off the bike and ran to the house. He got to the door, swung it open and ran inside. He tried to be sneaky. He didn’t want his parents to know he had come in late. He completely forgot about the door making a ruckus every time it closed. He raced to door to try to stop it from making the noise.
“Jake is that you?” his father had asked from the living room. Jake was so exhausted from the ride home, he could barely speak.
“Yes, dad,” he said panting.
“Where in the hell have you been, Jake? You were supposed to be home 5 minutes ago.” His father was really strict about being home on time. He wanted to say he was just outside for a bit, but he couldn’t stand lying to his father.
“I was at a church,” Jake said looking down at his shoes.
“A church? Why were you at this church?” his father asked him with and eyebrow raised.
“Well, I was listening to this guy talk about God,” Jake explained innocently.
“My gosh Jake! There is no God. People just say that so they can have something to believe in. Now go upstairs and finish your homework.”
Jake ran to his room and went to his bed. He lay there, thinking. His dad was usually right about stuff. Maybe there was no God. Maybe Dan was full of himself and didn’t know what he was talking about. He listened to a complete stranger and believed it. His dad was right, there was no God.
“Jake! Dinner is ready!” his mom called from downstairs.
He headed downstairs at the pace of a gazelle. He was so caught up in all this God stuff he almost forgot about his stomach. He sat down and as soon as he was about to attack the food, his mom smacked his hand.
“Not until everyone is seated,” she said as she was putting the food on the table. He looked around and everyone was seated, except his sister. He almost forgot about Jaime, who was still upstairs in her room.
“Jake, go upstairs and get your sister,” his mom ordered from across the table.
Jake rushed upstairs and headed towards Jamie’s room.
Her room was all pink. She had a pink bedspread, pink lamp, and a pink chair. Her room was also a mess. Toys were everywhere. There was so much clutter, that you couldn’t even see the floor.
Jake hopped everywhere around the room trying not to step on anything. He finally reached Jaime, who was playing with her dolls.
“Hey, sis. It’s time for supper,” he said tapping her on the shoulder.
“Okay,” she replied.
They both headed downstairs and got seated at the dinner table. Jake and Jaime sat across from each other, and his mom and dad sat at the ends of the table like the queen and king in old medieval times.
Today’s dinner was his mom’s specialty, corn on the cob, mashed potatoes and gravy, and grilled pork chops. His mom sure did make a mean batch of mashed potatoes.
Jake could finally start eating since everyone was seated.
“So are you two ready for the first day of school tomorrow?” his mother asked.
“Yes ma’am!” Jaime called out.
Jake just sat there, not knowing what to say.
“Jake? What about you? Are you ready for school tomorrow?” his mother asked eyeing him from across the table.
“Uh. Yes ma’am,” he lied when the truth was he wasn’t ready for the first day of school.
Last year, his best friend, Chase, moved away because his mom and dad got better jobs. It was a difficult time because he tried to make new friends but everyone ignored him. He hoped he would have better luck this year.
A fantastic dinner was made complete by a dessert of homemade ice cream. Jake was so stuffed afterwards.
He cleaned up the dinner table and washed the dishes. Afterwards he went upstairs to his room.
His room wasn’t all decorated like Jaime’s room. It was more conservative. He just had off-white walls with the occasional artwork that Jaime had drawn for him on them. Jaime was quite the artist.
He grabbed his notebook and an ink pen from his desk, then he got on his bed and began writing. Writing was Jake’s passion. He could write about absolutely anything. He always carried his notebook and his pen in case anything that came to mind, he could write down. He glanced at his watch. It read 9:27. Jake figured he’d get to bed at a decent hour. He put his notebook and pen under the mattress. Then he turned off the lights and went to bed.
Email me at aceedsall@yahoo.com if you want more of the story.
How is it?
great.
how did you fit so much i thought there are only 1000 characters to work with per question (then everything else must be added through additional details)
Reply:im a writer as well, and i've taken some beatings already. I mean, i havent published a book-i'm 13. but i can say for sure is that this chapter is a bit too choppy. for the 1sdt few sentances, you could do...
"It’s a beautiful morning. The sun was peeking up from the horizon, painting the sky with wonderful warm hues. The spring air was fresh, and the green grass was damp from the glistening morning dew. The earth slowly awakened from it's peaceful sleep, stretching it's arms known as trees and yawning, creating a light breeze. Jake Clemons was always up in time to watch the breathtaking sunrise. He'd be up before the rooster crows, or anyone else in fact."
i'd say add more flow and detail to the sentances, and make sure they're not too choppy.
hair care
It’s a beautiful morning. The sun was peeking from the horizon. The spring air was fresh, and the grass was damp from the morning dew. The earth slowly awakened from the peaceful night before. Jake Clemons was always up in time to watch the sunrise. He’s up before the rooster crows.
He got dressed quickly to watch the sunrise. He had to be quiet as he put on his red shirt ad blue jeans. He tiptoed down the hallway, and he passed Jamie’s room. Jamie was his 7 year old sister.
After he passed everyone’s rooms, he hurried down the stairs and out the door. He jogged towards the big red barn. He felt the dampness of the grass seep into his shoes. He then ran through the dry hay and to the silver ladder leading up to the loft. Jake climbed up the ladder and then he crawled towards the loft window and opened it. He sprawled out on the hay and gazed at the sunrise.
Watching the sunrise was a good time for Jake to think, and get his thoughts together. It was his only moment of peace during the day. He couldn’t possibly think in the day with all the commotion from his little sister, and all the work that had to be done, there was just no time.
“****-o-doodle-doo!” the rooster cried. It was time to get back to the house and cook breakfast. Jake usually made breakfast because everyone was just waking up at the sound of the rooster.
This morning he cooked scrambled eggs, toast, and he heated up some leftover sausage from the morning before. Everyone got seated at the table. It was delightful meal and got the day started off.
His parents usually watched the news right after breakfast, and then they get ready for work. Apparently they left it on, because Jaime was watching it when they got done watching it. He flipped the switch to turn the TV off.
“Hey!” Jaime whined.
“Jaime, you shouldn’t be watchin’ this stuff. It gives you nightmares.” Jake had already gone through experience. A few weeks ago they were watching the news and it was talking about some guy who escaped from the county jail near Chester. Jaime couldn’t go to sleep that night because she thought he would come and get her while she was sleeping.
“Fine,” she scoffed.
As soon as she left the room, he turned it back on.
“There is currently a prison escapee on the loose. He stole the security guard’s keys and escaped. He goes by the name of Greg Richards.”
It showed a picture of the escapee. He had a brown buzz cut, a goatee, and his ear pierced. He had a tan, and he looked to be in about his late 20’s. The news anchor continued with the story, “He was last seen driving a black Dodge Ram. If you have any information about this man, please call the police.”
“Jake, turn that off. You’ll probably have nightmares just like Jaime.” His mother was always comparing him to Jaime like that.
“Yes ma’am.” Jake turned off the TV.
His parents left for work about eight and they usually got home about 5:00. His mom worked at the grocery store as the manager and his dad worked at the local bank.
There was nothing to do at the house, so Jaime asked Jake if he could play a game with her. He didn’t mind, but she wanted to play some of the stupidest games.
“Okay Jaime, what do ya wanna play?” Jake asked reluctantly.
“Let’s play hide and go seek!” Jaime shouted. Jake never argued against having to play hide and go seek. It was one of his favorite games. He usually let Jaime hide otherwise she would whine and cry.
They ended up playing hide and seek for hours. His parents finally arrived home, so now he could go do something instead of playing with Jaime all day.
Jake figured he’d ride is bike. It was in terrible condition with worn out tires, red and rusted paint job, and the seat torn up. But he didn’t care. It was his only option to get away from the world. It made him feel free. He rode it everywhere around town. Of course the town was small enough to see everything in less than an hour on a bicycle.
The town was called Chester. It’s a population of about 1200 people. Chester has a bunch of old buildings from a long time ago. But most of those are abandoned. People just had a hard time keeping business in Chester. A whole bunch of people moved, which caused a lot of businesses to move, also.
His brown hair was waving in the wind. As he was riding his bike, he heard some bells from a distance. Not like the bells you hear at Christmas time, but big bells. They made such a noise that the whole town could hear them. Maybe even the whole county.
He decided to check and see where the bells were coming from. He followed the sound of the bells. It took about 2 minutes to get to where they were. They were coming from some large brick building with a white steeple. At the top of the steeple, there was a small cross. What kind of building has bells, and a steeple with a cross? He wondered. He decided to take a look inside.
He walked down the aisle of red carpet. There were people sitting in long stretched pews. Everyone was dressed nice and elegant. He felt like an outcast with the raggedy clothes he had on.
“Excuse me, young man. Why are you wearing such clothes?” an older woman asked him. He tried to speak but words wouldn’t budge. He was embarrassed.
“Young man?” she said.
He ran to the back of room. As he tried to get out the door, a man spoke. Jake turned around and saw a man in the front of the room. The man was tall, and he looked to be in his 30’s. He was wearing a white robe with a green stripe down the middle.
“Thank you everyone for being here tonight,” he said speaking through a microphone.
“I am the new preacher. My name is Dan Miller. I have recently moved here from Alabama, with my daughter, Carley, and my wife, Joyce,” he stated gesturing to his family in the front row.
Carley had shoulder length brown hair. She had the most amazing blue eyes Jake had ever seen.She looked nothing like her mom, Joyce.
Jake figured he would stay and listen what Dan had to say. He didn’t have to be home until 8 and it was only 6:45. He went and got seated in the last pew. He paid attention to this preacher as he spoke.
“God has a great amount of power. He is so big. He can do anything!” Dan exclaimed raising his hands in the air.
“Anything?” Jake whispered to himself.
Dan preached for the next hour about this God person. He said God was the man who created this very earth, and created us to live in it. Jake couldn’t wait to tell his parents about God.
Jake glanced at his watch. It read at exactly 7:56. Jake was supposed to be home at 8:00 sharp. He jumped on his bike and sped away. His house was about 1 mile out of Chester, so it took him about 10 minutes to get home, but at the speed he was going, Jake could’ve swore he got there in less than 5 minutes. He jumped off the bike and ran to the house. He got to the door, swung it open and ran inside. He tried to be sneaky. He didn’t want his parents to know he had come in late. He completely forgot about the door making a ruckus every time it closed. He raced to door to try to stop it from making the noise.
“Jake is that you?” his father had asked from the living room. Jake was so exhausted from the ride home, he could barely speak.
“Yes, dad,” he said panting.
“Where in the hell have you been, Jake? You were supposed to be home 5 minutes ago.” His father was really strict about being home on time. He wanted to say he was just outside for a bit, but he couldn’t stand lying to his father.
“I was at a church,” Jake said looking down at his shoes.
“A church? Why were you at this church?” his father asked him with and eyebrow raised.
“Well, I was listening to this guy talk about God,” Jake explained innocently.
“My gosh Jake! There is no God. People just say that so they can have something to believe in. Now go upstairs and finish your homework.”
Jake ran to his room and went to his bed. He lay there, thinking. His dad was usually right about stuff. Maybe there was no God. Maybe Dan was full of himself and didn’t know what he was talking about. He listened to a complete stranger and believed it. His dad was right, there was no God.
“Jake! Dinner is ready!” his mom called from downstairs.
He headed downstairs at the pace of a gazelle. He was so caught up in all this God stuff he almost forgot about his stomach. He sat down and as soon as he was about to attack the food, his mom smacked his hand.
“Not until everyone is seated,” she said as she was putting the food on the table. He looked around and everyone was seated, except his sister. He almost forgot about Jaime, who was still upstairs in her room.
“Jake, go upstairs and get your sister,” his mom ordered from across the table.
Jake rushed upstairs and headed towards Jamie’s room.
Her room was all pink. She had a pink bedspread, pink lamp, and a pink chair. Her room was also a mess. Toys were everywhere. There was so much clutter, that you couldn’t even see the floor.
Jake hopped everywhere around the room trying not to step on anything. He finally reached Jaime, who was playing with her dolls.
“Hey, sis. It’s time for supper,” he said tapping her on the shoulder.
“Okay,” she replied.
They both headed downstairs and got seated at the dinner table. Jake and Jaime sat across from each other, and his mom and dad sat at the ends of the table like the queen and king in old medieval times.
Today’s dinner was his mom’s specialty, corn on the cob, mashed potatoes and gravy, and grilled pork chops. His mom sure did make a mean batch of mashed potatoes.
Jake could finally start eating since everyone was seated.
“So are you two ready for the first day of school tomorrow?” his mother asked.
“Yes ma’am!” Jaime called out.
Jake just sat there, not knowing what to say.
“Jake? What about you? Are you ready for school tomorrow?” his mother asked eyeing him from across the table.
“Uh. Yes ma’am,” he lied when the truth was he wasn’t ready for the first day of school.
Last year, his best friend, Chase, moved away because his mom and dad got better jobs. It was a difficult time because he tried to make new friends but everyone ignored him. He hoped he would have better luck this year.
A fantastic dinner was made complete by a dessert of homemade ice cream. Jake was so stuffed afterwards.
He cleaned up the dinner table and washed the dishes. Afterwards he went upstairs to his room.
His room wasn’t all decorated like Jaime’s room. It was more conservative. He just had off-white walls with the occasional artwork that Jaime had drawn for him on them. Jaime was quite the artist.
He grabbed his notebook and an ink pen from his desk, then he got on his bed and began writing. Writing was Jake’s passion. He could write about absolutely anything. He always carried his notebook and his pen in case anything that came to mind, he could write down. He glanced at his watch. It read 9:27. Jake figured he’d get to bed at a decent hour. He put his notebook and pen under the mattress. Then he turned off the lights and went to bed.
Email me at aceedsall@yahoo.com if you want more of the story.
How is it?
great.
how did you fit so much i thought there are only 1000 characters to work with per question (then everything else must be added through additional details)
Reply:im a writer as well, and i've taken some beatings already. I mean, i havent published a book-i'm 13. but i can say for sure is that this chapter is a bit too choppy. for the 1sdt few sentances, you could do...
"It’s a beautiful morning. The sun was peeking up from the horizon, painting the sky with wonderful warm hues. The spring air was fresh, and the green grass was damp from the glistening morning dew. The earth slowly awakened from it's peaceful sleep, stretching it's arms known as trees and yawning, creating a light breeze. Jake Clemons was always up in time to watch the breathtaking sunrise. He'd be up before the rooster crows, or anyone else in fact."
i'd say add more flow and detail to the sentances, and make sure they're not too choppy.
hair care
Is it good? plz read?
I’m 13 yrs old and this is the first chpter of my book.
It was a beautiful morning. The sun was peeking from the horizon, painting the sky with wonderful warm hues. The spring air was fresh, and the green grass was damp from the glistening morning dew. The earth slowly awakened from its peaceful night, stretching it's arms known as trees and yawning, creating a light breeze. Jake Clemons was always up in time to watch the breathtaking sunrise. He'd be up before the rooster crowed, or anyone else in fact.
He got dressed quickly to watch the sunrise. He had to be quiet as he put on his red shirt ad blue jeans. He tiptoed down the hallway, and he passed Jamie’s room. Jamie was his 7 year old sister. She was snoring away like a cute little angel.
After he passed everyone’s rooms, he hurried down the stairs and out the door. He dashed towards the huge barn. He felt the dampness of the grass seep into his shoes as he was running. He then ran through the dry hay and to the silver ladder leading up to the loft. He couldn’t afford to miss even a minute of the sunrise. Jake climbed up the ladder and then he crawled towards the loft window and opened it. He sprawled out on the hay and gazed at the sunrise.
Watching the sunrise was a good time for Jake to think, and get his thoughts together. It was his only moment of peace during the day. He couldn’t possibly think in the day with all the commotion from his little sister, and all the work that had to be done, there was just no time.
“****-o-doodle-doo!” the rooster cried. It was time to get back to the house and cook breakfast. Jake usually made breakfast because everyone was just waking up at the sound of the rooster.
This morning he cooked scrambled eggs, toast, and he heated up some leftover sausage from the morning before. Everyone got seated at the table, yawing and barley awake. Jake was the only one wide-eyed an alert. The breakfast was a very was delightful meal and got the day started off.
Jake’s parents usually watched the news right after breakfast, and then they get ready for work. Apparently they left it on, because Jaime was watching it when they got done watching it. He flipped the switch to turn the TV off.
“Hey!” Jaime whined.
“Jaime, you shouldn’t be watchin’ this stuff. It gives you nightmares.” Jake had already gone through experience. A few weeks ago they were watching the news and it was talking about another guy who escaped from the county jail near Chester. Jaime couldn’t go to sleep that night because she thought he would come and get her while she was sleeping.
“Fine,” she scoffed as she stomped out of the room angrily. As soon as she left the room, he turned it back on.
“There is currently a prison escapee on the loose. He stole the security guard’s keys and escaped. He goes by the name of Greg Richards.”
It showed a picture of the escapee. He had a brown buzz cut, a goatee, and his ear pierced. He had a tan, and he appeared to be in about his late 20’s. The news anchor continued with the story, “He was last seen driving a black Dodge Ram. If you have any information about this man, please call the police.”
“Jake, turn that off. You’ll probably have nightmares just like Jaime.” His mother was always comparing him to Jaime like that.
“Yes ma’am.” Jake pushed the ‘OFF’ button.
His parents left for work about eight and they usually got home about 5:00. His mom was the manager at grocery store and his dad worked at the local bank.
There was nothing to do at the house, so Jaime asked Jake if he could play a game with her. He didn’t mind, but she wanted to play some of the stupidest games.
“Okay Jaime, what do ya wanna play?” Jake asked reluctantly.
“Let’s play hide and go seek!” Jaime shouted. Jake never argued against having to play hide and go seek. It was one of his favorite games. He usually let Jaime hide otherwise she would whine and cry.
They ended up playing hide and seek for hours. His parents finally arrived home, so now he could go do something instead of playing with Jaime all day.
Jake figured he’d ride is bike. It was in terrible condition with worn out tires, red and rusted paint job, and the seat torn up. But he didn’t care. It was his only option to get away from the world. It made him feel free. He rode it everywhere around town. Of course the town was small enough to see everything in less than an hour on a bicycle.
The town was called Chester. It’s a population of about 1200 people. Chester has a bunch of old buildings from a long time ago. But most of those are abandoned. People just had a hard time keeping business in Chester. A whole bunch of people moved, which caused a lot of businesses to move, also.
His brown hair was waving in the wind. As he was riding his bike, he heard some bells from a distance. Not like the bells you hear at Christmas time, but big bells. They made such a noise that the whole town could hear them. Maybe even the whole county.
He decided to check and see where the bells were coming from. He followed the sound of the bells. It took about 2 minutes to get to where they were. They were coming from some large brick building with a white steeple. At the top of the steeple, there was a small cross. What kind of building has bells, and a steeple with a cross? He wondered. He decided to take a look inside.
He walked down the aisle of red carpet. There were people sitting in long stretched pews. Everyone was dressed nice and elegant. He felt like an outcast with the raggedy clothes he had on.
“Excuse me, young man. Why are you wearing such clothes?” an older woman asked him. He tried to speak but words wouldn’t budge. He was embarrassed.
“Young man?” she said.
As he ran to the back of the room, a man spoke. Jake turned around and saw a tall man in the front of the room. He looked to be in his 30’s, and he was wearing a white robe with a green stripe down the middle.
“Thank you everyone for being here tonight,” he said speaking through a microphone.
“I am the new preacher. My name is Dan Miller. I have recently moved here from Alabama, with my daughter, Carley, and my wife, Joyce,” he stated gesturing to his family in the front row.
Carley had shoulder length brown hair with the most amazing blue
eyes Jake had ever seen. She looked nothing like her mom, Joyce, who had green eyes and blonde hair.
Jake figured he would stay and listen what Dan had to say. He didn’t have to be home until 8 and it was only 6:45. He went and got seated in the last pew. He paid attention to this preacher as he spoke. Jake pulled out a notebook and pen from his back pocket and began taking notes.
“God has a great amount of power. He is so big. He can do anything!” Dan exclaimed raising his hands in the air.
“Anything?” Jake whispered to himself.
Dan preached for the next hour about this God person. He said God was the man who created this very earth, and created us to live in it. Jake couldn’t wait to tell his parents about God.
Jake glanced at his watch, and it read at exactly 7:56. Jake was supposed to be home at 8:00 sharp. He jumped on his bike and sped away. His house was about 1 mile out of Chester, so it took him about 10 minutes to get home, but at the speed he was going, Jake could’ve swore he got there in less than 5 minutes. He jumped off the bike and darted to the house. He got to the door, swung it open and ran inside. He tried to be sneaky, He didn’t want his parents to know he had come in late. He completely forgot about the door making a ruckus every time it closed. He raced to door to try to stop it from making the noise.
“Jake is that you?” his father had asked from the living room. Jake was so exhausted from the ride home, he could barely speak.
“Yes, dad,” he said panting.
“Where in the hell have you been, Jake? You were supposed to be home 5 minutes ago.” His father was really strict about being home on time. He wanted to say he was just outside for a bit, but he couldn’t stand lying to his father.
“I was at a church,” Jake said looking down at his shoes.
“A church? Why were you at this church?” his father asked him with and eyebrow raised.
“Well, I was listening to this guy talk about God,” Jake explained innocently.
“My gosh Jake! There is no God. People just say that so they can have something to believe in. Now go upstairs and finish your homework.”
Jake ran to his room and went to his bed. He laid there, thinking. His dad was usually right about stuff. Maybe there was no God. Maybe Dan was full of himself and didn’t know what he was talking about. He listened to a complete stranger and believed it. His dad was right, there was no God.
“Jake! Dinner is ready!” his mom called from downstairs.
He headed downstairs at the pace of a gazelle. He was so caught up in all this God stuff he almost forgot about his stomach. He sat down and as soon as he was about to attack the food, his mom smacked his hand.
“Not until everyone is seated,” she said as she was putting the food on the table. He looked around and everyone was seated, except his sister, Jaime, who was still upstairs in her room.
“Jake, go upstairs and get your sister,” his mom ordered from across the table.
Jake rushed upstairs and headed towards Jamie’s room. Her room was all pink. She had a pink bedspread, pink lamp, and a pink chair. Her room was also a mess with toys everywhere. There was so much clutter, that you couldn’t even see the floor.
Jake hopped everywhere around the room trying not to step on anything. He finally reached Jaime, who was playing with her dolls.
“Hey, sis. It’s time for supper,” he said tapping her on the shoulder.
“Okay,” she replied.
They both headed downstairs and got seated at the dinner table. Jake and Jaime sat across from each other, and his mom and dad sat at the ends of the table like the queen and king in old medieval times.
Today’s dinner was his mom’s specialty, corn on the cob, mashed potatoes and gravy, and grilled pork chops. His mom sure did make a mean batch of mashed potatoes.
Jake could finally start eating since everyone was seated.
“So are you two ready for the first day of school tomorrow?” his mother asked.
“Yes ma’am!” Jaime called out.
Jake just sat there, not knowing what to say.
“Jake? What about you? Are you ready for school tomorrow?” his mother asked eyeing him from across the table.
“Uh. Yes ma’am,” he lied when the truth was he wasn’t ready for the first day of school.
Last year, his best friend, Chase, moved away because his mom and dad got better jobs. It was a difficult time because he tried to make new friends but everyone ignored him. He hoped he would have better luck this year.
A fantastic dinner was made complete by a dessert of homemade ice cream. Jake was so stuffed after dinner, he could barely walk. His mom’s homemade ice cream was his weakness.
He cleaned up the dinner table and washed the dishes. Afterwards he went upstairs to his room.
His room wasn’t all decorated like Jaime’s room. It was more conservative. He just had off-white walls with the occasional artwork that Jaime had drawn for him on them. Jaime was quite the artist.
He grabbed his notebook and an ink pen from his desk, and then he got on his bed and began writing. Writing was Jake’s passion. He could write about absolutely anything. He always carried his notebook and his pen in case anything that came to mind, he could write down. He glanced at his watch. It read 9:27. Jake figured he’d get to bed at a decent hour. He put his notebook and pen under the mattress, turned off the lights and went to bed. Email me at ace_edsall@yahoo.com to get more of the story.
Is it good? plz read?
Hey that's really good for a 13 year old!
Your writing style is really good. You're very descriptive %26amp; detailed, and you have an amazing vocabulary.
I think you're doing great! I like the story so far! Keep up the good work!
And could you email me the rest? htwnzprincess12@yahoo.com :)
EDIT: Oh, and here. Have a star! :)
Reply:I already answered this question. Don't overdo it.
Reply:Yes it is quite good, And especially for a girl only 13 years of age.
Get the book "Writing Down the Bones"!!!
Keep writing no matter what, no matter who tries to dissuade you!
And for personal practice and collecting of experience . . Journal, Journal, Journal!
Keep up the good work!
Reply:its very very good.
but you might want to work on making it hook in the reader byhaving maybe the escapee be standing in his room or somthing.
but kudos, very well written, you have talent!
Reply:you can write and you're very good with the descriptive. keep practicing, you show great promise.
i think the first paragraph was alot about nothing. great for descriptive writing class, but not to capture someones attention for long.
too many things going on and you didn't really get into anything in particular. i was waiting for "the punchline".
u need to GRAB the readers attention in the first paragraph and not lull them into long descriptions that really have no bearing on the story.
it needs more meat. get to the point.
i would change the brother and sisters name so they weren't so similar. i had to really focus on who was who. they all had the same sounding names of spellings....
jamie
jake
chester
joyce
dan stood out because it didn't start with a "j" and didn't have the "j" sound.
u asked, just giving u a readers point of view. i'm not a writer.
i admire ur bravery and spunk at such a young age and willing to take (i hope) constructive criticism.
best wishes.
Reply:when i read jack clemons i thought it said Jesus Christ. i don't think anyone else would though
Reply:itsz cool
Reply:I like it! When I was your age and younger I started writing atleast a dozen different stories but never finished them. I didnt think they were "good enough". Dont be the same as me. Keep writing! I'd love to read some more so just email it to me (a link to my email is in my profile).
Reply:B.O.RRRRRRR.I.N.G
try with the shorter one!
Reply:Awesome, sounds interesting to me ;-)
Reply:WOW gr8. longest question i ever read.. but wonderful.
Reply:Just give taste.........then we could read it.
Reply:I can say that it is a wonderful begining to your book. When or if you finish you could send me the next chapter or chapters . Thanks. dan_198660120@aol.com
Reply:wow dude that's really long.. sorry :)
Reply:I'm sorry but thats just a really long question, and If i wasn't ready to go to bed I would probably read the whole story...next time you ask this question you should just like put in a little sample of this.
Reply:For someone your age it is very good! Keep up the great writing, I think it sounds awesome. Also, you sound like you might be good at poetry, too.
Reply:ZZZZZZzzzzzzz
Reply:sorry hun, that's a RLY long question....
Reply:I have better things to do
Reply:I DONT HAVE THE TIME TO READ THAT
Reply:i have no time to read.
i have more important things to do than reading your story.
Reply:Go to bed!
freckles
It was a beautiful morning. The sun was peeking from the horizon, painting the sky with wonderful warm hues. The spring air was fresh, and the green grass was damp from the glistening morning dew. The earth slowly awakened from its peaceful night, stretching it's arms known as trees and yawning, creating a light breeze. Jake Clemons was always up in time to watch the breathtaking sunrise. He'd be up before the rooster crowed, or anyone else in fact.
He got dressed quickly to watch the sunrise. He had to be quiet as he put on his red shirt ad blue jeans. He tiptoed down the hallway, and he passed Jamie’s room. Jamie was his 7 year old sister. She was snoring away like a cute little angel.
After he passed everyone’s rooms, he hurried down the stairs and out the door. He dashed towards the huge barn. He felt the dampness of the grass seep into his shoes as he was running. He then ran through the dry hay and to the silver ladder leading up to the loft. He couldn’t afford to miss even a minute of the sunrise. Jake climbed up the ladder and then he crawled towards the loft window and opened it. He sprawled out on the hay and gazed at the sunrise.
Watching the sunrise was a good time for Jake to think, and get his thoughts together. It was his only moment of peace during the day. He couldn’t possibly think in the day with all the commotion from his little sister, and all the work that had to be done, there was just no time.
“****-o-doodle-doo!” the rooster cried. It was time to get back to the house and cook breakfast. Jake usually made breakfast because everyone was just waking up at the sound of the rooster.
This morning he cooked scrambled eggs, toast, and he heated up some leftover sausage from the morning before. Everyone got seated at the table, yawing and barley awake. Jake was the only one wide-eyed an alert. The breakfast was a very was delightful meal and got the day started off.
Jake’s parents usually watched the news right after breakfast, and then they get ready for work. Apparently they left it on, because Jaime was watching it when they got done watching it. He flipped the switch to turn the TV off.
“Hey!” Jaime whined.
“Jaime, you shouldn’t be watchin’ this stuff. It gives you nightmares.” Jake had already gone through experience. A few weeks ago they were watching the news and it was talking about another guy who escaped from the county jail near Chester. Jaime couldn’t go to sleep that night because she thought he would come and get her while she was sleeping.
“Fine,” she scoffed as she stomped out of the room angrily. As soon as she left the room, he turned it back on.
“There is currently a prison escapee on the loose. He stole the security guard’s keys and escaped. He goes by the name of Greg Richards.”
It showed a picture of the escapee. He had a brown buzz cut, a goatee, and his ear pierced. He had a tan, and he appeared to be in about his late 20’s. The news anchor continued with the story, “He was last seen driving a black Dodge Ram. If you have any information about this man, please call the police.”
“Jake, turn that off. You’ll probably have nightmares just like Jaime.” His mother was always comparing him to Jaime like that.
“Yes ma’am.” Jake pushed the ‘OFF’ button.
His parents left for work about eight and they usually got home about 5:00. His mom was the manager at grocery store and his dad worked at the local bank.
There was nothing to do at the house, so Jaime asked Jake if he could play a game with her. He didn’t mind, but she wanted to play some of the stupidest games.
“Okay Jaime, what do ya wanna play?” Jake asked reluctantly.
“Let’s play hide and go seek!” Jaime shouted. Jake never argued against having to play hide and go seek. It was one of his favorite games. He usually let Jaime hide otherwise she would whine and cry.
They ended up playing hide and seek for hours. His parents finally arrived home, so now he could go do something instead of playing with Jaime all day.
Jake figured he’d ride is bike. It was in terrible condition with worn out tires, red and rusted paint job, and the seat torn up. But he didn’t care. It was his only option to get away from the world. It made him feel free. He rode it everywhere around town. Of course the town was small enough to see everything in less than an hour on a bicycle.
The town was called Chester. It’s a population of about 1200 people. Chester has a bunch of old buildings from a long time ago. But most of those are abandoned. People just had a hard time keeping business in Chester. A whole bunch of people moved, which caused a lot of businesses to move, also.
His brown hair was waving in the wind. As he was riding his bike, he heard some bells from a distance. Not like the bells you hear at Christmas time, but big bells. They made such a noise that the whole town could hear them. Maybe even the whole county.
He decided to check and see where the bells were coming from. He followed the sound of the bells. It took about 2 minutes to get to where they were. They were coming from some large brick building with a white steeple. At the top of the steeple, there was a small cross. What kind of building has bells, and a steeple with a cross? He wondered. He decided to take a look inside.
He walked down the aisle of red carpet. There were people sitting in long stretched pews. Everyone was dressed nice and elegant. He felt like an outcast with the raggedy clothes he had on.
“Excuse me, young man. Why are you wearing such clothes?” an older woman asked him. He tried to speak but words wouldn’t budge. He was embarrassed.
“Young man?” she said.
As he ran to the back of the room, a man spoke. Jake turned around and saw a tall man in the front of the room. He looked to be in his 30’s, and he was wearing a white robe with a green stripe down the middle.
“Thank you everyone for being here tonight,” he said speaking through a microphone.
“I am the new preacher. My name is Dan Miller. I have recently moved here from Alabama, with my daughter, Carley, and my wife, Joyce,” he stated gesturing to his family in the front row.
Carley had shoulder length brown hair with the most amazing blue
eyes Jake had ever seen. She looked nothing like her mom, Joyce, who had green eyes and blonde hair.
Jake figured he would stay and listen what Dan had to say. He didn’t have to be home until 8 and it was only 6:45. He went and got seated in the last pew. He paid attention to this preacher as he spoke. Jake pulled out a notebook and pen from his back pocket and began taking notes.
“God has a great amount of power. He is so big. He can do anything!” Dan exclaimed raising his hands in the air.
“Anything?” Jake whispered to himself.
Dan preached for the next hour about this God person. He said God was the man who created this very earth, and created us to live in it. Jake couldn’t wait to tell his parents about God.
Jake glanced at his watch, and it read at exactly 7:56. Jake was supposed to be home at 8:00 sharp. He jumped on his bike and sped away. His house was about 1 mile out of Chester, so it took him about 10 minutes to get home, but at the speed he was going, Jake could’ve swore he got there in less than 5 minutes. He jumped off the bike and darted to the house. He got to the door, swung it open and ran inside. He tried to be sneaky, He didn’t want his parents to know he had come in late. He completely forgot about the door making a ruckus every time it closed. He raced to door to try to stop it from making the noise.
“Jake is that you?” his father had asked from the living room. Jake was so exhausted from the ride home, he could barely speak.
“Yes, dad,” he said panting.
“Where in the hell have you been, Jake? You were supposed to be home 5 minutes ago.” His father was really strict about being home on time. He wanted to say he was just outside for a bit, but he couldn’t stand lying to his father.
“I was at a church,” Jake said looking down at his shoes.
“A church? Why were you at this church?” his father asked him with and eyebrow raised.
“Well, I was listening to this guy talk about God,” Jake explained innocently.
“My gosh Jake! There is no God. People just say that so they can have something to believe in. Now go upstairs and finish your homework.”
Jake ran to his room and went to his bed. He laid there, thinking. His dad was usually right about stuff. Maybe there was no God. Maybe Dan was full of himself and didn’t know what he was talking about. He listened to a complete stranger and believed it. His dad was right, there was no God.
“Jake! Dinner is ready!” his mom called from downstairs.
He headed downstairs at the pace of a gazelle. He was so caught up in all this God stuff he almost forgot about his stomach. He sat down and as soon as he was about to attack the food, his mom smacked his hand.
“Not until everyone is seated,” she said as she was putting the food on the table. He looked around and everyone was seated, except his sister, Jaime, who was still upstairs in her room.
“Jake, go upstairs and get your sister,” his mom ordered from across the table.
Jake rushed upstairs and headed towards Jamie’s room. Her room was all pink. She had a pink bedspread, pink lamp, and a pink chair. Her room was also a mess with toys everywhere. There was so much clutter, that you couldn’t even see the floor.
Jake hopped everywhere around the room trying not to step on anything. He finally reached Jaime, who was playing with her dolls.
“Hey, sis. It’s time for supper,” he said tapping her on the shoulder.
“Okay,” she replied.
They both headed downstairs and got seated at the dinner table. Jake and Jaime sat across from each other, and his mom and dad sat at the ends of the table like the queen and king in old medieval times.
Today’s dinner was his mom’s specialty, corn on the cob, mashed potatoes and gravy, and grilled pork chops. His mom sure did make a mean batch of mashed potatoes.
Jake could finally start eating since everyone was seated.
“So are you two ready for the first day of school tomorrow?” his mother asked.
“Yes ma’am!” Jaime called out.
Jake just sat there, not knowing what to say.
“Jake? What about you? Are you ready for school tomorrow?” his mother asked eyeing him from across the table.
“Uh. Yes ma’am,” he lied when the truth was he wasn’t ready for the first day of school.
Last year, his best friend, Chase, moved away because his mom and dad got better jobs. It was a difficult time because he tried to make new friends but everyone ignored him. He hoped he would have better luck this year.
A fantastic dinner was made complete by a dessert of homemade ice cream. Jake was so stuffed after dinner, he could barely walk. His mom’s homemade ice cream was his weakness.
He cleaned up the dinner table and washed the dishes. Afterwards he went upstairs to his room.
His room wasn’t all decorated like Jaime’s room. It was more conservative. He just had off-white walls with the occasional artwork that Jaime had drawn for him on them. Jaime was quite the artist.
He grabbed his notebook and an ink pen from his desk, and then he got on his bed and began writing. Writing was Jake’s passion. He could write about absolutely anything. He always carried his notebook and his pen in case anything that came to mind, he could write down. He glanced at his watch. It read 9:27. Jake figured he’d get to bed at a decent hour. He put his notebook and pen under the mattress, turned off the lights and went to bed. Email me at ace_edsall@yahoo.com to get more of the story.
Is it good? plz read?
Hey that's really good for a 13 year old!
Your writing style is really good. You're very descriptive %26amp; detailed, and you have an amazing vocabulary.
I think you're doing great! I like the story so far! Keep up the good work!
And could you email me the rest? htwnzprincess12@yahoo.com :)
EDIT: Oh, and here. Have a star! :)
Reply:I already answered this question. Don't overdo it.
Reply:Yes it is quite good, And especially for a girl only 13 years of age.
Get the book "Writing Down the Bones"!!!
Keep writing no matter what, no matter who tries to dissuade you!
And for personal practice and collecting of experience . . Journal, Journal, Journal!
Keep up the good work!
Reply:its very very good.
but you might want to work on making it hook in the reader byhaving maybe the escapee be standing in his room or somthing.
but kudos, very well written, you have talent!
Reply:you can write and you're very good with the descriptive. keep practicing, you show great promise.
i think the first paragraph was alot about nothing. great for descriptive writing class, but not to capture someones attention for long.
too many things going on and you didn't really get into anything in particular. i was waiting for "the punchline".
u need to GRAB the readers attention in the first paragraph and not lull them into long descriptions that really have no bearing on the story.
it needs more meat. get to the point.
i would change the brother and sisters name so they weren't so similar. i had to really focus on who was who. they all had the same sounding names of spellings....
jamie
jake
chester
joyce
dan stood out because it didn't start with a "j" and didn't have the "j" sound.
u asked, just giving u a readers point of view. i'm not a writer.
i admire ur bravery and spunk at such a young age and willing to take (i hope) constructive criticism.
best wishes.
Reply:when i read jack clemons i thought it said Jesus Christ. i don't think anyone else would though
Reply:itsz cool
Reply:I like it! When I was your age and younger I started writing atleast a dozen different stories but never finished them. I didnt think they were "good enough". Dont be the same as me. Keep writing! I'd love to read some more so just email it to me (a link to my email is in my profile).
Reply:B.O.RRRRRRR.I.N.G
try with the shorter one!
Reply:Awesome, sounds interesting to me ;-)
Reply:WOW gr8. longest question i ever read.. but wonderful.
Reply:Just give taste.........then we could read it.
Reply:I can say that it is a wonderful begining to your book. When or if you finish you could send me the next chapter or chapters . Thanks. dan_198660120@aol.com
Reply:wow dude that's really long.. sorry :)
Reply:I'm sorry but thats just a really long question, and If i wasn't ready to go to bed I would probably read the whole story...next time you ask this question you should just like put in a little sample of this.
Reply:For someone your age it is very good! Keep up the great writing, I think it sounds awesome. Also, you sound like you might be good at poetry, too.
Reply:ZZZZZZzzzzzzz
Reply:sorry hun, that's a RLY long question....
Reply:I have better things to do
Reply:I DONT HAVE THE TIME TO READ THAT
Reply:i have no time to read.
i have more important things to do than reading your story.
Reply:Go to bed!
freckles
Can you run barefoot in a track meet?
I've been running barefoot on easy practice days and after workout days for the past month and a half. I've increased calcium intake by taking two teaspoons of pure liquid calcium concentrate in addition to drinking plenty of milk and fortified cereals and soymilk along with my daily vitamins to help my bones adjust to the new stresses. Today I finished my first workout without shoes. 6x1000m @ 3:38 on our cross country course which is like 99% grass. I'm to the point now where I feel like I can run in a race barefoot for a mile. I took 3 cool down laps today on the track and I feel like I can handle the rubber surface. Has anyone ever witnessed a barefoot runner in a meet or cross country event? Is this even allowed? I know that in Indiana cross country you have to have at least one shoe on at all times. Not sure about the track meets though. I've already planned out a strategy to win, sprint out to avoid spikes. I'm a decent miler. I can get in the high 4:40s.
Can you run barefoot in a track meet?
There are more and more barefoot runners all over the US. I don't know much detail since I'm just a barefooter in everyday life, not much into running, but I bet someone at one of the barefoot runner sites or forums can help you; these guys run marathons and such barefoot too!
Reply:why would u run barefooted homie u need track shoes like nikes or sum air balances for track
Reply:ask the red barons and coaches to check if it ok
if it is ok, then do it
but if not, you might as well use track spikes
Reply:Why would you do that?
Reply:dude there's SHARP!!! rocks on the xc and dirt tracks!!!
Reply:nah. I don't think u can run barefooted.
Reply:Yes if your used to it but ask your coach first. Don't do it in an important meet or you may get disqualified.
Reply:It is allowed under NCAA, and USATF, but not National Federation of High Schools, so I don't think you can do that in Indiana. I know you can not do that in Texas.
Reply:In international competition you may run barefoot--there was a Kenyan who ran the steeplechase barefoot at World Championships a few years ago, though I can't find a reference on this.
You may also run barefoot in NCAA competition--I did so a couple times in college, and in the early 1990s a runner won the NCAA cross country championship barefoot.
On the other hand high school leagues tend to have exhuastive and restrictive rules to prevent any kind of injury, so that would depend on the state or even the meet director.
Incidentally Abebe Bikila won the 1960 Olympic marathon running barefoot over the cobblestones on Rome, and won again in 1964, this time in shoes!
Reply:Ya gotta be kidding me homie..
Reply:well,yes you can run barefoot but... i definitly wouldn't recomend you run bare all the timemaybe just like once a week so you don't hurt your feet but it can be good for all your muscles.
good luck♥
insurance
Can you run barefoot in a track meet?
There are more and more barefoot runners all over the US. I don't know much detail since I'm just a barefooter in everyday life, not much into running, but I bet someone at one of the barefoot runner sites or forums can help you; these guys run marathons and such barefoot too!
Reply:why would u run barefooted homie u need track shoes like nikes or sum air balances for track
Reply:ask the red barons and coaches to check if it ok
if it is ok, then do it
but if not, you might as well use track spikes
Reply:Why would you do that?
Reply:dude there's SHARP!!! rocks on the xc and dirt tracks!!!
Reply:nah. I don't think u can run barefooted.
Reply:Yes if your used to it but ask your coach first. Don't do it in an important meet or you may get disqualified.
Reply:It is allowed under NCAA, and USATF, but not National Federation of High Schools, so I don't think you can do that in Indiana. I know you can not do that in Texas.
Reply:In international competition you may run barefoot--there was a Kenyan who ran the steeplechase barefoot at World Championships a few years ago, though I can't find a reference on this.
You may also run barefoot in NCAA competition--I did so a couple times in college, and in the early 1990s a runner won the NCAA cross country championship barefoot.
On the other hand high school leagues tend to have exhuastive and restrictive rules to prevent any kind of injury, so that would depend on the state or even the meet director.
Incidentally Abebe Bikila won the 1960 Olympic marathon running barefoot over the cobblestones on Rome, and won again in 1964, this time in shoes!
Reply:Ya gotta be kidding me homie..
Reply:well,yes you can run barefoot but... i definitly wouldn't recomend you run bare all the timemaybe just like once a week so you don't hurt your feet but it can be good for all your muscles.
good luck♥
insurance
BEST joke ever....pee your pants laughing because its true!?
69 Things to do in Wal-Mart
* Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
* Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
* Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
* Start playing football -- see how many people you can get to join in.
* Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and yell, ''I need some tampons!!''
* Try on bras over top of your clothes.
* Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms.
* While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible ''Sex and Candy''
* Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, ''I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares,'' and see what happens.
* Tune all the radios to a polka station, then turn them all off and turn the volumes to ''10.''
* Play with the automatic doors.
* Walk up to complete strangers and say, ''Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!...'' etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
* While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, ''Who BUYS this ****, anyway?''
* Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.
* Put pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually.
* Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins.
*. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
* As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, ''Wow. Magic!''
* Put M%26amp;M's on layaway.
* Move ''Caution: Wet Floor'' signs to carpeted areas.
* Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
* Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
* Nonchalantly ''test'' the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
* Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,''...I'm Batman. Come, Robin -- to the Batcave!"
* TP as much of the store as possible.
* Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
* Play with the calculators so that they all spell ''hello'' upside down. (01134)
* When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, ''Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
* When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, ''Red Rover!''
* Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
* Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
* Take bets on the battle described above.
* Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. Barbie. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect...)
* While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
* While no one's watching, quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the restrooms.
* Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from ''Mission: Impossible.'
* Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
* Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
* Fill an entire cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone's jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.
* Set up a ''Valet Parking'' sign in front of the store.
* Two words: ''Marco Polo.'
* Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
* ''Re-alphabetize'' the CDs in Electronics.
* In the auto department, practice your ''Madonna'' look with various funnels. * Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like ''the fat man walks alone,'' and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them.
* While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying ''How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won.'' Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.
* When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, ''No, no! It's those voices again!''
* Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
* Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax.If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
* Get a stuffed animal, go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying ''Good girl, good Bessie."
* Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putting one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.
* When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
* Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
* Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
* Test the fishing rods and see what you can ''catch'' from the other aisles.
* In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with a girl and start flirting with him as ditisily as possible: ''Hi! (giggle) What's your sign? (giggle).'' When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. ''Hi! (giggle) What's your sign? (giggle).''
* Hold indoor shopping cart races.
* Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
* When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially through narrow aisles. * Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
* Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap. * Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
* Say things like, ''Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?''
* Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., ''Do you have any Shnerples here?''
* Ride a display bicycle through the store -- claim you're taking it for a ''test drive.''
* Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
* Get boxes of condoms and randomly slip them into peoples' carts when they aren't paying attention.
BEST joke ever....pee your pants laughing because its true!?
wow, there's a lot of things to do at walmart, that's funny and true !!!
:-D
thanx 4 the laugh
i think i'll try some of those
Reply:heres another one i saw on an email to a friend: go into the dressing rooms, wait and yell ''there's no toilet paper in here!" Report It
Reply:weird. A wal mart just opened up today here we are at. lol. Sad thing is I read thru your list, you wouldn't last long..but they are funny. not pee your pants funny. but all the same
Reply:lol wow do u ever sleep;P♣
Reply:you forgot about going in and out the doors to see if the greeter says hi every time
Reply:sorry not funny...
Reply:Add this one: when they are doing the free samples of eats and stuff, take one, gobble it down, grab your throat, wheeze and fall to the floor kicking and grunting. Once you have an audience, stand and take a bow.
I did this in the Walmart in Athens Alabama, and drew a standing ovation, and was escorted out of the store, my wife laughed so hard she peed her pants.
Reply:I sure didn't pee in my pants (Thank God). But hey, gotta hand it to ya. That was some funny stuff. I liked the one about the tampons. Tnx for the laughs.
Peace Out!
True Lebanese Soldier.
Reply:Heard it before, but funny stuff!
Reply:LOL.
Have a great day!
Reply:Would you Please come to wal mart with me on my next trip
Reply:Ha ha!!!
Reply:I have seen this before. Funny...not pee in your pants funny, but funny.
Reply:i actually have a check list and some others, like the person said above, walk in and out the store and see if the greeter greets you every time...i've done this a few times...like putting the condoms in other peoples' carts it's hilarious every time!!!!
i'm gonna print this and show it to my friends, and possibly do a few of these next time i visit wal*mart!!
Reply:You know, I thought me and MY friends were evil but that is great! Thanks for the tips!
Reply:i only read one thing and i know you right cause wall mart is mad fun
Reply:Omg, so funny. Really almost peed my pants, prob cause I would never have the guts to do any of that.
Reply:u have a lot of time `on your hands
Reply:Very imaginative. How long did it take you to come up with such a list?
Reply:So that is what I am doing wrong!
Thanks for the advise, I'm gonna go try it out now...lol
Reply:ha
Reply:awesome would it work in tescos
Reply:do u eat or sleep at all?
Reply:tee hee heee this was awsomely funny lol
Reply:hahaha!!!
Reply:I think doing these things would get you kicked out of walmart and have the law called on you or both. This is so immature. Who would really do these things??
maintenance repairs
* Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
* Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
* Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
* Start playing football -- see how many people you can get to join in.
* Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and yell, ''I need some tampons!!''
* Try on bras over top of your clothes.
* Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms.
* While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible ''Sex and Candy''
* Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, ''I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares,'' and see what happens.
* Tune all the radios to a polka station, then turn them all off and turn the volumes to ''10.''
* Play with the automatic doors.
* Walk up to complete strangers and say, ''Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!...'' etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
* While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, ''Who BUYS this ****, anyway?''
* Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.
* Put pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually.
* Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins.
*. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
* As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, ''Wow. Magic!''
* Put M%26amp;M's on layaway.
* Move ''Caution: Wet Floor'' signs to carpeted areas.
* Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
* Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
* Nonchalantly ''test'' the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
* Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,''...I'm Batman. Come, Robin -- to the Batcave!"
* TP as much of the store as possible.
* Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
* Play with the calculators so that they all spell ''hello'' upside down. (01134)
* When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, ''Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
* When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, ''Red Rover!''
* Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
* Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
* Take bets on the battle described above.
* Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. Barbie. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect...)
* While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
* While no one's watching, quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the restrooms.
* Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from ''Mission: Impossible.'
* Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
* Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
* Fill an entire cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone's jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.
* Set up a ''Valet Parking'' sign in front of the store.
* Two words: ''Marco Polo.'
* Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
* ''Re-alphabetize'' the CDs in Electronics.
* In the auto department, practice your ''Madonna'' look with various funnels. * Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like ''the fat man walks alone,'' and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them.
* While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying ''How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won.'' Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.
* When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, ''No, no! It's those voices again!''
* Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
* Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax.If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
* Get a stuffed animal, go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying ''Good girl, good Bessie."
* Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putting one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.
* When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
* Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
* Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
* Test the fishing rods and see what you can ''catch'' from the other aisles.
* In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with a girl and start flirting with him as ditisily as possible: ''Hi! (giggle) What's your sign? (giggle).'' When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. ''Hi! (giggle) What's your sign? (giggle).''
* Hold indoor shopping cart races.
* Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
* When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially through narrow aisles. * Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
* Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap. * Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
* Say things like, ''Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?''
* Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., ''Do you have any Shnerples here?''
* Ride a display bicycle through the store -- claim you're taking it for a ''test drive.''
* Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
* Get boxes of condoms and randomly slip them into peoples' carts when they aren't paying attention.
BEST joke ever....pee your pants laughing because its true!?
wow, there's a lot of things to do at walmart, that's funny and true !!!
:-D
thanx 4 the laugh
i think i'll try some of those
Reply:heres another one i saw on an email to a friend: go into the dressing rooms, wait and yell ''there's no toilet paper in here!" Report It
Reply:weird. A wal mart just opened up today here we are at. lol. Sad thing is I read thru your list, you wouldn't last long..but they are funny. not pee your pants funny. but all the same
Reply:lol wow do u ever sleep;P♣
Reply:you forgot about going in and out the doors to see if the greeter says hi every time
Reply:sorry not funny...
Reply:Add this one: when they are doing the free samples of eats and stuff, take one, gobble it down, grab your throat, wheeze and fall to the floor kicking and grunting. Once you have an audience, stand and take a bow.
I did this in the Walmart in Athens Alabama, and drew a standing ovation, and was escorted out of the store, my wife laughed so hard she peed her pants.
Reply:I sure didn't pee in my pants (Thank God). But hey, gotta hand it to ya. That was some funny stuff. I liked the one about the tampons. Tnx for the laughs.
Peace Out!
True Lebanese Soldier.
Reply:Heard it before, but funny stuff!
Reply:LOL.
Have a great day!
Reply:Would you Please come to wal mart with me on my next trip
Reply:Ha ha!!!
Reply:I have seen this before. Funny...not pee in your pants funny, but funny.
Reply:i actually have a check list and some others, like the person said above, walk in and out the store and see if the greeter greets you every time...i've done this a few times...like putting the condoms in other peoples' carts it's hilarious every time!!!!
i'm gonna print this and show it to my friends, and possibly do a few of these next time i visit wal*mart!!
Reply:You know, I thought me and MY friends were evil but that is great! Thanks for the tips!
Reply:i only read one thing and i know you right cause wall mart is mad fun
Reply:Omg, so funny. Really almost peed my pants, prob cause I would never have the guts to do any of that.
Reply:u have a lot of time `on your hands
Reply:Very imaginative. How long did it take you to come up with such a list?
Reply:So that is what I am doing wrong!
Thanks for the advise, I'm gonna go try it out now...lol
Reply:ha
Reply:awesome would it work in tescos
Reply:do u eat or sleep at all?
Reply:tee hee heee this was awsomely funny lol
Reply:hahaha!!!
Reply:I think doing these things would get you kicked out of walmart and have the law called on you or both. This is so immature. Who would really do these things??
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